Think Right Now Series:
Get the relationship you want
- both new and old
by Mike Brescia

Get the relationship you want - both new and old
by Mike Brescia

As I mentioned recently, we are hiring again.

And the resumes are pouring in.

Among the piles, you'd think that there would be many stars to choose from. But in reading them, you get a good sense for what is important to most of the applicants...

Me, me, me, me, me, me, me and for safe measure, me again.

No concern for what a prospective employer may be interested in. No clue and no concern. It doesn't even enter on their "radar."

Only about 6 in 10 follow directions and send a cover letter at all even though we ask for one. Most of the ones that do write a cover letter, tell us why they want the job, not what they can give their prospective employer.

"I want the job to reach my goals."
"Hire me because I have a degree."
"I would like to start a new career."
"Your job will give me additional experience."
"I have..."

Hardly any write about helping us reach our objectives as a company.

Even in the age of personal home computers, many of the cover letters sent to us are the same ones every other prospective employer gets - not tailored in ANY way to the requirements listed.

The most important letters most of them will ever write and this is what we see.

The point of this is this:

Most people have ALL their priorities screwed up, not just their resume. The resume/cover letter happens to be a fantastic mirror into their entire lives, not just their careers and formal education. Ask any HR person about this.

For anyone familiar with Zig Ziglar, the legendary motivational trainer and author of the book, See You At The Top as well as many others, you'll remember this famous quote:

"You can get anything you want in life as long as you help enough other people get what they want."

You can have all kinds of fancy degrees.

You can be drop-dead gorgeous.

You can be the strong as an oak tree.

You can have more experience than anyone.

But if you don't like other people that awful much... If you don't care that much about what anyone else wants, my friend, you are going to have a tough life in a lot of ways. And you won't know why bad things continue to happen to you.

If you get angry a lot at others...

If you feel jealous a fair amount...

If you are into revenge...

If there a lot of people that you truly don't like...

If your feelings get hurt easily...

If your relationships end abruptly and you don't want them to...

If you put your foot in your mouth way too many times...

...Then chances are good that you believe "Oh, if it weren't for (that one scene/event/statement)."

No. It is rarely one thing that leads to your demise.

Hardly ever.

It's how you feel deep down about other people that create your ongoing behaviors.

People aren't stupid.

If you don't like them, they know it, deep down.

If you are upset, others know it, no matter how well you think you are masking it.

If you are P.O.'d, you may think you are hiding it, but other people can see it.

People aren't stupid.

You can often see through the deceptions of others. But you probably think that you are better at hiding negative emotions. Chances are excellent, though, that you aren't so good that people can't read between the lines.

When you put others first, when you help out even when you aren't asked, when you are truly concerned deep in your heart, when you want what's best for the team/ company/ family/ relationship, it comes out in your FACE, your WORDS and your ACTIONS.

If it's not there inside, it doesn't make it outside.

THAT is what Win Friends & Influence People Now! is about...

Putting it on the inside so that it CAN come out.

It is NOT a "how-to" program.

It is a behavior modification program where the objective is to force the human relations mind-set on you...

...To program you for effective outcomes with other people.

It will MAKE you treat other people better.

And you will win and get your way more often because of it.

Because books are nice for learning a technique.

But you'd STILL have to think before you act.

Win Friends & Influence People Now! will help you to act WITHOUT HAVING TO THINK.

Remember these truths always:

1 - You cannot give what you don't have.

2 - You cannot give what you are not.

If you are a cat, you will act like a cat. If you are a dog, you will act like a dog.

Still, before you have that chat, write that letter or give that speech, think about what the other person wants and/or is concerned with.

It will always go better for you.

But while techniques can "work" in the short-term, it is who you are (dog? cat?) that will ensure your ongoing succëss in the long-term.

Remember those two truths above?

I love you all!

Mike Brescia

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